How to get out of the ADHD freeze
You’re not lazy for not being able to get up from your couch – you’re in a nervous system freeze-state.
Imagine this: You’re sitting on your couch for hours, unable to get up because there’s just SO MUCH to get done. You feel overwhelmed and frozen, stuck in a doom scroll while simultaneously having Netflix running in the background playing episode after episode of your comfort show.
You keep telling yourself ‘I’ll stop after this episode’ or ‘I’ll get up at 7pm’, and somehow time (and episode on episode) keep passing, and you’re still unable to move.
Your mind is a constant shame-loop about all of the things you should be doing, how you’ll be going to bed waaay too late and how you just wish you could get up. You sink deeper and deeper into your own head, until you’re barely paying attention to any of the two screens you’re using.
You’re in the ADHD freeze. And I want to help you get out of it.
But before we get into that, I want to take a step back, and talk a little bit about what the ADHD freeze is, so you understand the approach I want you to take with this.
What is the ADHD freeze?
The ADHD freeze is a response in your nervous system to pressure or perceived danger – and it’s the most dysregulated state of them all.
You’ve probably heard about being in fight-or-flight, which basically means that our brains and nervous systems are wired to react to danger either by running from it, or attempting to fight it. It’s a survival mechanism that’s hardwired into your body, to make sure that you react and are able to survive when faced with danger.
But what happens, when you’re not able to fight or run from the danger (in olden times, that could be a bear or a lion)? Your body locks into a freeze-state, where it numbs out every emotion and sensation and keeps you frozen in place, so you can have a swift and painless death.
The only problem is… You’re not in any physical danger when you are on your couch, feeling stressed out about your to-do list or your bedtime. But your brain does not know the difference between perceived danger and actual danger. And when you have ADHD, your threshold for what your nervous system perceives as dangerous… Well, let’s just say it’s pretty low.
With ADHD you have a sensitive nervous system that is easily overwhelmed. And when you’re overwhelmed, you go into fight-or-flight. And if it’s really bad, you go into a freeze-state. And that’s the ADHD freeze.
Here’s what you need to understand to make a change
80 percent of the messages that are being passed between your body and your brain goes from your body to your brain.
Sensations that your body is picking up through all of your senses are constantly being reported from your body to your brain, which shapes your thoughts and actions.
Your body registers that you’re hungry => it sends a signal to your brain => you start thinking about food => you seek out food to eat.
Your thoughts are shaped by what’s happening in your body.
That means that you can’t think your way out of the ADHD freeze – because you’re in a frozen state because your body picked up something your logical mind didn’t.
That also means:
You can’t shame yourself into action.
And…
Your way out of the ADHD freeze is through your body.
Now, let’s talk about what you can do to change it.
Quick-win strategies
Before we talk about the deep work, I want to give you a few strategies that can help you out when you’re in the freeze. These won’t necessarily make the issue less frequent long-term, but they can help you out in a pinch.
Because the freeze-state is such a deep state of dysregulation, you need to gently nudge yourself out of it. Think small actions first.
If you have difficulties getting up, I want you to pick out a few of the following strategies to try out:
Use your fingertips to caress the skin on your arms. You can lightly use your nails as well, if that works.
Massage and scratch your skull or your feet.
Hum or sing your favorite song.
Look gently around the room – move your eyeballs and your head around and scan the room.
Look around you, and find 4 things you can see, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can hear and 1 thing you can smell.
Wiggle your toes and your fingers.
Gargle water for 30 seconds to 1 minute.
Remind your body: “I’m safe right now.”
Gently sway your body or rock side to side in your seat.
Bounce your heels or tap your feet lightly.
Smell a scent you like (essential oil, coffee or fresh air).
Sip a warm drink slowly and mindfully.
If you manage to get up, here’s a few things that can further help you get out of your ADHD freeze:
Take a shower.
Run cold water over your wrists. Submerge your face into cold water.
Go for a walk.
Get your pulse up with 10-20 squats.
Get a long hug or cuddle session from a loved one.
Do something with your hands - like knitting, baking, painting etc.
These strategies might not fix things for you, but should help nudge you out of the deepest states of the dysregulation.
The long-term work
I recommend also doing long-term work to help improve the flexibility of your nervous system, so you are able to handle more without going into a freeze-state.
Then you’ll need these strategies less frequently, simply because you won’t be experiencing the ADHD freeze as frequently.
To start this work, I recommend working on emotional regulation and nervous system regulation. This helps you regulate those systems that are currently working overtime and putting your system into a state of constant alertness.
The best place to start is by heading over to the article below and starting there: